Greetings, aspiring adventurers!
I am Professor Richard Crackfang, esteemed Orc wizard and scholar of all things arcane.
Some people (uncultured brutes, really) might remember me by a different name—one I have long since abandoned in favor of a name more, well, wizardly.
I mean, seriously, would you take D&D advice from someone named Lump Crackfang?
Yeah, me neither. That's exactly why I now call myself Richard. And as much as a despise it—or more likely because I despise it—all my friends call me Dick (which is almost as bad a Lump).
And, yes, if you’re wondering. I am a real D&D character, I am an Orc, and I am a wizard. I’m being played every two weeks by the guy with the big gray beard at the very bottom of this post.
Anyway…
If you are new to Dungeons & Dragons—or curious but overwhelmed by strange terms like “initiative,” “saving throw,” and “proficiency bonus”—then you’ve come to the right place.
This newsletter is your beginner-friendly guide to the world’s greatest role-playing game.
Whether you’re preparing for your first-ever session or ready to embark on grander quests, you’ll find everything you need to get started, including:
Zero-to-One Basics – Learn how to create a character, understand the dice, and survive your first adventure.
Next Steps – Tips for new Dungeon Masters (DMs), house rules, storytelling tips, and even other TTRPGs like Shadowdark RPG.
Arcane Wisdom & Orcish Shenanigans – Practical advice, myth-busting, and the occasional unsolicited rant about why wizards deserve more respect.
Who Is This For?
Total beginners who don’t know where to start.
Novice players who are ready to—or need to, ready or not—dig a little deeper, like how to learn to be a DM.
Curious minds who want to understand what all the dice-rolling fuss is about.
If that sounds like you, subscribe now and begin your journey into D&D—no experience, prior knowledge, or intelligence-saving throws required. I’ll be your guide. (Though, regrettably, I cannot grant bonus XP for subscribing.)
Yours in scholarly wisdom,
-- Professor Richard Crackfang, A.W.E. (Arcane Wizard Extraordinaire)
